We all know how my body hates pregnancy. This time (and last time, too), I've been diagnosed with postpartum thyroiditis, a temporary condition in which my thyroid overproduces, causing hyperthyroidism.
I've had hypothyroidism for 10 years now, and my thyroid levels have been stable that entire time with me taking 88mcg of levothyroxine. Without that tiny green pill every morning, I'm very, very sick. Thyroid function sometimes changes during pregnancy, so I've always had my thyroid checked during each trimester and 6 weeks after delivery. My numbers have always been fine except for after delivering Russell and Zachery, when my thyroid goes into overdrive. With Russ, the doctor just wanted to watch it with extra blood tests and see what would happen. It normalized after a few months and all was fine, although I suspect that had to do with my postpartum depression and awful milk supply. This time around, my OB wanted me to cut my thyroid pill in half and follow up with an endocrinologist. What did the endo find? We are grossly under-treating my thyroid and he wants me to go back on my full dose and get my blood checked again in two months. Also, I'm very vitamin d deficient and need to take OTC supplements religiously.
I haven't felt that tired lately. Only as tired as I would expect to be with three small, crazy boys and too many 8AM doctor appointments. I have felt an unhealthy amount of anxiety lately, so hopefully that will improve when my thyroid normalizes. And maybe I'll find out how it feels to be able to hop out of bed easily in the morning, and keep up with my kids all day! One can hope....
Also, the endo ran some tests to see where I'm at with my PCOS. I'm glad to report that I'm NOT pre-diabetic (which is a common concern with PCOS). Not even close. Whew! And my liver and kidneys are happy, which is good.
Showing posts with label Pregnancy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pregnancy. Show all posts
Wednesday, November 4, 2015
Thursday, May 28, 2015
Introducing: Zachary! (And a birth story)
Zachary LaVell Purser
7 lbs 5 oz
19 in
37 weeks 5 days
The Birth Story:
For the past month or so, my blood pressure and the protein levels in my urine have been creeping up. Not bad enough to do anything about, but bad enough to pay a little extra attention to. At my 36-week appointment my blood pressure spiked higher than ever (just a few points away from declaring preeclampsia) so my doctor told me to go to Labor and Delivery on that next Saturday for a non-stress test (where they monitor Baby's heartbeat and my contractions) and a blood pressure check. Nate and I had discussed how perfect it would be to have a baby on the Saturday afternoon of a 3-day weekend. But we both got the feeling that this day was not the day, so I didn't even pack my bags. I headed off to L&D while Nate stayed home with the kids to mow the lawn.
A neighbor of mine was the charge nurse at L&D when I got there. She got me hooked up and my blood pressure was reaching new levels. The first few checks were alarmingly high. After about half an hour my blood pressure was consistently low, though, which was reassuring. The not-so-reassuring part of it all was the baby's heart rate. It was in the safe range, but there wasn't enough variation. He had been extremely active the night before, but since waking up that Saturday morning he had only moved a few times. The whole time I was hooked up to the monitor he only stretched out twice, and didn't move at all other than that. They were looking for his heart rate to increase every now and then, but it didn't move around at all. After getting a good picture of how the baby was doing in there according to his heart rate, my neighbor/nurse sent the info to the doctor on call. She came back shortly and said, "How would you like to have a baby today?" I kinda freaked out inside! I was excited, but not mentally ready! She said that he didn't look too bad in there, but not too good, either, and since I was past 37 weeks they'd feel more comfortable getting him out rather than leaving him in. I had been having the exact same feeling for the few weeks previous, so even though I know that the closer to the due date the better, there are instances where 37 weeks is better than 39 weeks, so we had to go with it!
So they sent me down the hall to a delivery room. It was about 11AM by this time, and they wanted to monitor me for another half hour before starting pitocin, just to make sure that the baby looked like he could handle pitocin. If not, they would have done an c-section. But he looked fine for that next half hour (and for the rest of the induction, too), so they started a very slow, low dose of pitocin to get things started. At this point I was dilated to 3cm, which is where I'd been for the two weeks previous.
Nate had to bring the big brothers to their swimming lessons at 12:20, so he didn't get to the hospital until just past 2PM, after gathering my things and getting things situated with the boys. His sister came to watch them and stay the night. On his way out, he found the new camera that we had ordered on the front porch that wasn't supposed to arrive for another week. It was a sign. ;) Today was the day, and we needed the new camera to document it!
Shortly after Nate showed up, around 2:30, the doctor broke my water and increased the pitocin. I was still just dilated to 3cm. I could feel the contractions, but they weren't painful at all. Far less painful than the ones I had been having on my own for the past few weeks! The nurses estimated that he would be born around 8PM.
Right around 5, the contractions started feeling rather painful. I knew that I didn't want an epidural unless things dragged on, but when the pain gets real you start thinking about it. ;)
I had always heard that when you deliver without an epidural, you feel "pressure" when you're getting close to pushing. By "pressure," they really mean you feel like you need to have a bowel movement. I didn't feel that at any point, but I was starting to feel like I was constipated. The nurse said that was a good sign so she checked me again. I was 5.5cm and 90% effaced, and she said it felt like I had a forebag of water that would need to be broken, so she'd have to call the doctor in. I could feel it break while she was checking me, and that's when things got real.
It's a bit of a blur, but I was having less than a minute break between contractions, so they turned off the pitocin. I was getting a little frantic with the extreme pain and couldn't stop thinking about the epidural. They could tell I was close, even though I was only dilated to 5.5cm, so they started getting the room ready, and fast. I started feeling nauseated. Not 10 minutes later they checked me again and I was 8cm. I didn't know what to do with myself, and was going out of my mind, so I started pushing. The doctor was there and checked me again and I was fully dilated.
My first push was not a good one. I think I was scared of what would happen if I really pushed. Then I got scared of what would happen if I didn't push! They kept telling me to grab behind my knees, but there was no way I was letting go of those bed rails! I found myself screaming involuntarily. I gave two good pushes and his head was out. One more really good push and he was born at 5:49PM! Just before the nurses' shift change. ;)
They put him on my belly to rub him and suction his mouth and nose. They didn't do that with Russell, and I was surprised how wonderful it was! They left him there for a few moments, until the cord stopped pulsing before cutting it. Then they quickly took him over for a weight and a diaper before putting him on my bare chest. We cuddled like that for the next few hours! It was amazing! He was still all covered in vernix and blood and nobody cared! In that time the doctor delivered the placenta and gave me one tiny stitch from a super tiny tear.
And that's Zachary's birth story! About 6 hours of labor total, but only about 45 minutes of pain, when I went from 3cm to delivering a baby! It was all so bizarre, and not what I was expecting, but looking back I can say that it was exactly how I wanted it! I can't say I'll ever be brave enough to deliver unmedicated again, but it was a really good experience with the happiest of endings!
I had always heard that when you deliver without an epidural, you feel "pressure" when you're getting close to pushing. By "pressure," they really mean you feel like you need to have a bowel movement. I didn't feel that at any point, but I was starting to feel like I was constipated. The nurse said that was a good sign so she checked me again. I was 5.5cm and 90% effaced, and she said it felt like I had a forebag of water that would need to be broken, so she'd have to call the doctor in. I could feel it break while she was checking me, and that's when things got real.
It's a bit of a blur, but I was having less than a minute break between contractions, so they turned off the pitocin. I was getting a little frantic with the extreme pain and couldn't stop thinking about the epidural. They could tell I was close, even though I was only dilated to 5.5cm, so they started getting the room ready, and fast. I started feeling nauseated. Not 10 minutes later they checked me again and I was 8cm. I didn't know what to do with myself, and was going out of my mind, so I started pushing. The doctor was there and checked me again and I was fully dilated.
My first push was not a good one. I think I was scared of what would happen if I really pushed. Then I got scared of what would happen if I didn't push! They kept telling me to grab behind my knees, but there was no way I was letting go of those bed rails! I found myself screaming involuntarily. I gave two good pushes and his head was out. One more really good push and he was born at 5:49PM! Just before the nurses' shift change. ;)
They put him on my belly to rub him and suction his mouth and nose. They didn't do that with Russell, and I was surprised how wonderful it was! They left him there for a few moments, until the cord stopped pulsing before cutting it. Then they quickly took him over for a weight and a diaper before putting him on my bare chest. We cuddled like that for the next few hours! It was amazing! He was still all covered in vernix and blood and nobody cared! In that time the doctor delivered the placenta and gave me one tiny stitch from a super tiny tear.
He is almost exactly three times Caleb's birth weight and exactly one pound less than Russell's birth weight!
And that's Zachary's birth story! About 6 hours of labor total, but only about 45 minutes of pain, when I went from 3cm to delivering a baby! It was all so bizarre, and not what I was expecting, but looking back I can say that it was exactly how I wanted it! I can't say I'll ever be brave enough to deliver unmedicated again, but it was a really good experience with the happiest of endings!
Thursday, April 16, 2015
32 weeks 3 days
I'm well into the 30s now and it's pretty exciting! My doctor started seeing me every two weeks basically since my surgery and every time we meet he is so excited to see that I'm still holding strong! Just a few more weeks and we'll be even more relieved!
I had my checkup today and everything looked great with one exception. The protein levels in my urine have been creeping up since about 26 weeks and today they were high enough to warrant a 24-hour urine collection. This means preeclampsia could be our next problem. (I called it...I really did. I knew this was going to happen over a month ago.) But honestly, it may not be anything to worry about quite yet because my blood pressure is fine. I normally have super low blood pressure, so I suppose that could make it harder to catch because what's normal for everyone else would be high for me. But with no swelling or debilitating headaches (although I have started getting a few super mild headaches in the last few weeks), I'm feeling optimistic. Mostly I'm just relieved to be past 32 weeks, because I could handle having my baby at any point now. Of course, I'm still holding out for a 9-pounder, so I'm really hoping this doesn't put a kink in my plans! We'll just have to see what the labs say. Keep your fingers crossed for me, would ya?
More generic pregnancy updates:
I seem to be recovering well from my gallbladder removal. I was told that the internal stitches will take two months to dissolve, so that should happen in the next few weeks. As for now, they appear to be trying to make their way out through my skin instead of just dissolving like good little stitches are supposed to do. My incisions are getting more red, tender, and swollen, although they don't appear to be infected at all. My OB told me not to be surprised if my skin opens up and a few stitches come out. Sounds fine by me. I'll just be glad to have that part over with.
We decided to be proactive about my heartburn. Since I was feeling the pain and then treating it with zantac and tums every single day, my OB was on board with me taking generic prevacid to stop the pain before it starts. It's made a world of difference, I tell you. It even seems to help with the debilitating pain I sometimes feel where my gallbladder used to reside. I don't know what's up with that, but I'm hoping it goes away after the baby comes and my organs aren't all squished up under my ribs.
I think I've developed a bit of sleep apnea. Sometimes I wake in the night, gasping for air. It's a strange sensation, for sure. My doctor's not too concerned about it, especially since we're getting so close to the finish line. I can live with it for another eight weeks.
My weight has been weird. I gained at least 8 pounds of IV fluids during my hospital stay, and then I lost 16 pounds, putting me 8 pounds below where I was when I was admitted to the hospital. It has taken the last 6 weeks to gain that 8 pounds back. So as of yesterday I have gained 16 pounds total during this pregnancy. It's definitely less than my first two pregnancies (where I gained 15 pounds by 27 weeks with each), but if I gain the expected one pound per week from here on out, that'll put me right at 24 pounds when I deliver, which is just right. My weight was completely stagnant for a while after my surgery, so I was worried about how the baby was going to grow, but we're all caught up now. :)
The baby is measuring just right, around 32-33 weeks.
I have another ultrasound to look at the heart at 34 weeks to check on the echogenic foci (is that the plural of focus? because there are three...). After that, I'll see my doc every week.
I wake up once every single night to use the bathroom, usually around 3-4AM.
My aching right hip keeps me tossing and turning all night.
I've been pulling abdominal muscles, which doesn't feel that great. It literally leaves me unable to do anything but sit on the couch for a few days, but then it seems to go away.
I'm still feeling pretty good otherwise, which is awesome. You might be able to count my hankerin' for fresh fruit as a craving. Jimmy John's sandwiches are also on my "gosh that sounds so good" list. I had a dream about Jimmy John's and fruit the other night. It was amazing. I'm loving apple slices and peanut butter. Hot chocolate chip cookies. Yum. Goldfish crackers. Ikea meatballs. That's about it. ;)
Here are all my recent belly shots!:
32 weeks 3 days!
More generic pregnancy updates:
I seem to be recovering well from my gallbladder removal. I was told that the internal stitches will take two months to dissolve, so that should happen in the next few weeks. As for now, they appear to be trying to make their way out through my skin instead of just dissolving like good little stitches are supposed to do. My incisions are getting more red, tender, and swollen, although they don't appear to be infected at all. My OB told me not to be surprised if my skin opens up and a few stitches come out. Sounds fine by me. I'll just be glad to have that part over with.
We decided to be proactive about my heartburn. Since I was feeling the pain and then treating it with zantac and tums every single day, my OB was on board with me taking generic prevacid to stop the pain before it starts. It's made a world of difference, I tell you. It even seems to help with the debilitating pain I sometimes feel where my gallbladder used to reside. I don't know what's up with that, but I'm hoping it goes away after the baby comes and my organs aren't all squished up under my ribs.
I think I've developed a bit of sleep apnea. Sometimes I wake in the night, gasping for air. It's a strange sensation, for sure. My doctor's not too concerned about it, especially since we're getting so close to the finish line. I can live with it for another eight weeks.
My weight has been weird. I gained at least 8 pounds of IV fluids during my hospital stay, and then I lost 16 pounds, putting me 8 pounds below where I was when I was admitted to the hospital. It has taken the last 6 weeks to gain that 8 pounds back. So as of yesterday I have gained 16 pounds total during this pregnancy. It's definitely less than my first two pregnancies (where I gained 15 pounds by 27 weeks with each), but if I gain the expected one pound per week from here on out, that'll put me right at 24 pounds when I deliver, which is just right. My weight was completely stagnant for a while after my surgery, so I was worried about how the baby was going to grow, but we're all caught up now. :)
The baby is measuring just right, around 32-33 weeks.
I have another ultrasound to look at the heart at 34 weeks to check on the echogenic foci (is that the plural of focus? because there are three...). After that, I'll see my doc every week.
I wake up once every single night to use the bathroom, usually around 3-4AM.
My aching right hip keeps me tossing and turning all night.
I've been pulling abdominal muscles, which doesn't feel that great. It literally leaves me unable to do anything but sit on the couch for a few days, but then it seems to go away.
I'm still feeling pretty good otherwise, which is awesome. You might be able to count my hankerin' for fresh fruit as a craving. Jimmy John's sandwiches are also on my "gosh that sounds so good" list. I had a dream about Jimmy John's and fruit the other night. It was amazing. I'm loving apple slices and peanut butter. Hot chocolate chip cookies. Yum. Goldfish crackers. Ikea meatballs. That's about it. ;)
Here are all my recent belly shots!:
28w1d
29 weeks
30 weeks
Today, at 32w3d.
My insanely adorable baby boy with chubby cheeks and squishy lips and a button nose at 29 weeks.
Tuesday, March 10, 2015
27 weeks 1 day
I have officially made it to the point in my pregnancy where I delivered Caleb! If I make it through the night, as I tell myself, this baby will have a better start than his oldest brother. After seeing your tiny baby struggle, that's a big deal!
It's crazy to think that this little guy (gosh, I wish we had a name for him!) is about two and a half pounds right about now. On his ultrasound last week, he looked so much like Caleb did when he was born! He's got the same face shape, the same chubbyish cheeks...
It's crazy to think that this little guy (gosh, I wish we had a name for him!) is about two and a half pounds right about now. On his ultrasound last week, he looked so much like Caleb did when he was born! He's got the same face shape, the same chubbyish cheeks...
It's crazy to think that that's what's growing inside of me, kicking all day long, getting stronger every day.
Stay put for another three months, Little Guy, ok?
So. This pregnancy. You see, after dealing with the pain of infertility, and the struggle of having a micro preemie, I try not to take a single day of my pregnancy for granted. I'm so very grateful that I get to have this experience. So I don't want to complain, not at all, but I just have to say...this sucks. Even though my pregnancy with Russell taught me that I'd rather be 40 weeks pregnant than have a newborn, I'm just really looking forward to this being over. And can you blame me? I was sick to the point where you couldn't even mention food to me until 15 weeks (and needed one ER visit for IV fluids when I had a stomach virus), I bled from 13-18 weeks (requiring another ER visit) and was on bed rest that whole time, and then at 26 weeks I needed surgery (and another ER visit and 3-day hospital stay) to have my gall bladder removed. Seriously? This has just been a horrible experience all around. I'd like to think that now it's time to relax and enjoy the rest of my pregnancy (last time I wasn't all that uncomfortable when I got huge in my last trimester), but I can't shake the feeling that something is coming next. Maybe preeclampsia (I did have a little protein in my urine while I was in the hospital, which I've never had before). Maybe preterm labor. Maybe the placental abruption will rear its ugly head again. Maybe something else obscure, like that gall bladder mess, that isn't even on my radar. I don't know. All I know is that I'm anxious to cross the finish line.
On a more generic update:
I've been throwing up about once every other week, and needing to pop a zofran for nausea a few times a week. It's usually water first thing in the morning that pushes me over the edge and sends me to throw up.
I have awful heartburn, especially in the evenings or after eating chocolate, and it requires a zantac and a tums to combat it.
My hair is falling out like mad, but my thyroid is a-ok.
I passed my glucose test with flying colors (thank goodness, because most of the time I feel like I'm getting low blood sugar and I need candy of some sort to make me feel less queasy).
I've gained around 15 pounds, which is right on track...but that's sort of a guess, because I always retain a ton of fluids when I'm on an IV, so I literally gained at least 8 pounds in my 3 days in the hospital. I'm still losing it after coming home 4 days ago.
Both my hips ache when I sleep at night, even though I've been using a pillow between my legs since at least 10 weeks. My right hip is much worse, and it's definitely something more than sciatic nerve pain. Sometimes when I roll over at night I'll feel my hip joint pop and feel instant relief. I also have to be careful not to aggravate the nerve when I give myself my progesterone shot on that side.
I've definitely adopted a waddle since my surgery, and I think it's here to stay.
And since pregnancy isn't all bad, my skin is clearer than ever! Because I have PCOS, I have acne from my messed up hormones. My hormones must be doing something right right now, and I'm really enjoying having clear skin. :)
I don't have to deal with insane cravings, which is nice. There are some foods that I think about more than others (chocolate cake, strawberries, and goldfish crackers at the moment), but this is the first pregnancy where I'm not a slave to whatever sounds good. That's a pretty nice feeling.
I also haven't had headaches with this pregnancy. I had debilitating headaches with the first two, so I really appreciate that I don't need to be taking tylenol all day long, taking naps, turning off the lights and closing the curtains, and drinking tons of water and even caffeine to try to get the headaches to subside. That was seriously awful, so I'm so happy to not have to deal with that!
Well, happy 27+1 to me and my third baby boy! I would go get some cake to celebrate, but leaving the house (read: putting on real clothes, aka, maternity pants that will make contact with my incisions) doesn't appeal to me, so I just had some chocolate cake that our awesome neighbors brought us when they brought dinner a few days ago. I finished it up. No shame.
And since there are only two pairs of pajama pants that are comfortable on my post-surgery belly, there will be no 27+1 picture today. But here are the other random belly shots I've taken recently:
21 weeks
23 weeks
24 weeks
23w4d with Caleb and 23 weeks with Russell
25 weeks
26 weeks
I'll let you imagine just how big I must be now and I promise I'll try to remember to take a picture the next time I actually put on something other than pajamas. :)
Sunday, March 8, 2015
Gall Bladder Woes
Once again, I woke up at 3:30AM. Instead of bleeding, this time I was in intense pain. For the first few seconds, if felt like an awful back ache. It didn't take long to escalate and become unbearable. It felt like labor cramps, but it engulfed my rib cage. I woke Nate and told him I was in pain, then went downstairs to try to walk it off. I thought maybe the baby had cozied up in my rib cage, and I tried to push him out. I thought maybe I had a spinal infection caused by my weekly progesterone shots. I thought maybe it was appendicitis, but I couldn't tell where my appendix might be since my anatomy is all squished together because of my growing belly. The thought that I could be in labor at 26 weeks 2 days put me over the edge. That is just way too early to be having a baby! And besides, my belly didn't feel tight. I tried rocking on my hands and knees. I tried massaging my back against the door jam. I tried breathing through the pain. After about an hour, I sent Nate a text saying that I needed him to come downstairs to give me a blessing. I don't remember what was said, but I do remember thinking that this wasn't going to go away on its own.
So we left our sleeping boys in their beds, called a neighbor to come sleep on our couch, and left for the emergency room.
I was in so much pain!!!! They had to put me in a wheelchair (they wanted to send me straight to labor and delivery, which freaked me out) and Nate had to answer all of the questions because I couldn't talk or think through the pain. There was no question my pain level was at a 10! I never thought I'd be able to say that, because I am no wimp, but this was a 10, no doubt!
They ended up taking a urine sample, getting some blood, doing a non-stress test (monitoring the baby's heartbeat and my contractions), and starting an IV with morphine. After the morphine kicked in, I felt like I could function like a semi-sane human again. There was still no way I was going to go anywhere without a wheelchair, and by the time the morphine started to wear off I started writhing around on the bed again, but I had a few hours where I could think through the pain, which was nice.
Anyway, long story short, they were going to assume that it was kidney stones and we'd just have to control the pain while waiting for them to pass. My blood, urine, and kidney ultrasounds showed nothing to lead them to believe that it was kidney stones, but it was their best guess since they couldn't do an MRI on a pregnant patient. They were discussing admitting me for pain management (ie, giving me a morphine pump), because a few hours of morphine and some oral pain meds were clearly not going to do the trick. When those meds were wearing off and the pain was coming back, it was easier to tell that the pain was originating from just under my rib cage on my right side. The wonderful L&D nurse (seriously, I hope she delivers this baby in 3 months) had a "light bulb" moment and said, "Let's do an ultrasound of your gall bladder!"
So they did it, and it took a while to get the results back, so they admitted me on the Mother/Baby floor, set me up with a morphine pump (literal life-saver, there) and let me order lunch. I took a few bites of food and couldn't keep it down. I didn't exactly feel sick, but my stomach was just rejecting anything, even juice and crackers.
Eventually, in comes the surgeon, Dr. Patterson, to explain to me that I do, indeed have gall stones. Two large ones and many small ones. The small ones could travel through the duct and into my liver or pancreas and cause all sorts of serious problems there, and one of the large ones is currently blocking the gall bladder duct, causing the spasms and pain. He said that the best course of action for me would be surgery to remove my gall bladder, and if I hadn't had lunch (even though I threw it up...) he could have done it then and there. He also said that it's common for pregnant women to develop gall stones, and that they only feel safe removing gall bladders during the second trimester, before the growing uterus makes it too difficult to do it laproscopically. Since I'm less than 2 weeks away from my third trimester, time was of the essence.
So I immediately start "fasting" and we plan to do the surgery in about four hours. It's usually an outpatient surgery, but since I'm pregnant they wanted to keep me at least overnight so they could do a continual non-stress test to make sure the baby was alright and that the surgery wouldn't cause me to go into labor. Then, on second thought, the nurse comes back in and says that they want to transfer me to Utah Valley Regional Medical Center, where they have neonatologists and an awesome NICU (the very same one that Caleb stayed at for his first 100 days of life) that could take care of us in the rare chance that this surgery caused the baby to come early. And since I was on morphine, the only way they could send me was via ambulance.
(*Side note: When Nate told the boys that I was going to ride in an ambulance, Caleb said, "NO WAY!" like he was jealous because it was so cool. Russ said, "Oh no!" like he was concerned because I must be really hurt. Those boys are so different! And so funny!*)
Anyway, I end up in L&D at UVRMC. We waited all night to see the on-call surgeon, who wasn't exactly on-call...they tried for hours to reach him, and he just never answered his phone. They would have gone with another surgeon, but Dr. Patterson had already talked to him and gone over my test results and medical history with him, so he "knew" me and my situation. They eventually realized that the surgery wouldn't happen that night, and let me eat a little jello and drink some apple juice. I promptly threw it all up. Nice. The surgeon, Dr. Rasmussen, ended up coming in late that night and talked to me about the risks and benefits of doing the surgery. He basically put the choice in my hands. I felt a little like I would be crazy to opt for the surgery, but crazy not to. It was dangerous either way. If we chose not to do the surgery, it could cause serious problems for my liver and pancreas, or cause me to be in extreme pain for the rest of my pregnancy, and once we got into the third trimester they wouldn't be able to do anything about it without delivering the baby first. If we chose to go with the surgery, it needed to be done ASAP to minimize the chance that they'd have to do a big incision (instead of laproscopic) which would require a longer hospitalization and a much harder recovery. It could also cause me to go into labor and deliver a baby at 26 weeks, which is kind of a big deal! That's even earlier than Caleb, who was born at 27 weeks 1 day! We were to let him know in the morning. So Nate and I talked and prayed about it, and I just felt strongly that I trusted the first doctor's opinion more, and he suggested the surgery right then and there. I felt that the off chance of going into labor, or needing an open incision and longer recovery time, were worth the risk. After all, if I went into labor, they could probably stop it, or at least hold it off for a few weeks. Not to mention, I couldn't spend the rest of my pregnancy dependent on morphine, and there was no way I could handle the pain without it. And then there's the fact that I was completely unable to eat or drink....So surgery was our decision.
So they did surgery the next morning! It went well. Four laproscopic incisions. The doctor said my gall bladder was starting to look inflamed. Baby was going nuts afterwards, tons of movement with a good, strong heartbeat. It was all very comforting. Before going into the OR I was feeling like another "gall bladder attack" was coming on, which just confirmed that this surgery was the right choice. And when I came out of the OR, that pain was completely gone. It was replaced by a new pain, the kind you feel after you've been cut open and an internal organ was removed, but that kind of pain is more tolerable because you know that it will improve with time.
They let me order a late lunch, and I didn't throw up! And I haven't thrown up since (although I've been eating really small portions)!
They monitored my little guy all through that night and until they discharged me around noon the next day. He has a really steady heartbeat. I felt like I got to know him better through this. After all, he went through everything right there with me! He's been through a lot for an unborn baby! The heart monitor picked up and magnified his hiccups, and he hiccuped a lot! He also would kick all day long against the monitor, which makes a really loud sound. This kid is gonna have personality, I tell ya. But after all of this, I feel more bonded to him.
I was discharged after 2 nights and 2.5 days total. Recovering at home has been hard...my lungs hurt, which is a normal part of recovering from an abdominal surgery. I need to cough and breathe deeply, but it just hurts so much! I've got a slight fever, and that first night at home my oxygen levels had me worried. But today I woke up feeling half-way like a functioning human, and tomorrow will be just a little better, so I think I'll be ok. :) We'll see how living a gall bladder-less life effects me...good thing I never really jumped on that bacon bandwagon! It's safe to say I'll be sad if I can never comfortably eat a donut again. So far I haven't had any morning sickness or heartburn. I can't say it has anything to do with the surgery, but hey, I'll take it! There's a good chance that I can go on living without ever thinking of my lack of a gall bladder ever again, and that's the goal.
So we left our sleeping boys in their beds, called a neighbor to come sleep on our couch, and left for the emergency room.
I was in so much pain!!!! They had to put me in a wheelchair (they wanted to send me straight to labor and delivery, which freaked me out) and Nate had to answer all of the questions because I couldn't talk or think through the pain. There was no question my pain level was at a 10! I never thought I'd be able to say that, because I am no wimp, but this was a 10, no doubt!
They ended up taking a urine sample, getting some blood, doing a non-stress test (monitoring the baby's heartbeat and my contractions), and starting an IV with morphine. After the morphine kicked in, I felt like I could function like a semi-sane human again. There was still no way I was going to go anywhere without a wheelchair, and by the time the morphine started to wear off I started writhing around on the bed again, but I had a few hours where I could think through the pain, which was nice.
Anyway, long story short, they were going to assume that it was kidney stones and we'd just have to control the pain while waiting for them to pass. My blood, urine, and kidney ultrasounds showed nothing to lead them to believe that it was kidney stones, but it was their best guess since they couldn't do an MRI on a pregnant patient. They were discussing admitting me for pain management (ie, giving me a morphine pump), because a few hours of morphine and some oral pain meds were clearly not going to do the trick. When those meds were wearing off and the pain was coming back, it was easier to tell that the pain was originating from just under my rib cage on my right side. The wonderful L&D nurse (seriously, I hope she delivers this baby in 3 months) had a "light bulb" moment and said, "Let's do an ultrasound of your gall bladder!"
So they did it, and it took a while to get the results back, so they admitted me on the Mother/Baby floor, set me up with a morphine pump (literal life-saver, there) and let me order lunch. I took a few bites of food and couldn't keep it down. I didn't exactly feel sick, but my stomach was just rejecting anything, even juice and crackers.
Eventually, in comes the surgeon, Dr. Patterson, to explain to me that I do, indeed have gall stones. Two large ones and many small ones. The small ones could travel through the duct and into my liver or pancreas and cause all sorts of serious problems there, and one of the large ones is currently blocking the gall bladder duct, causing the spasms and pain. He said that the best course of action for me would be surgery to remove my gall bladder, and if I hadn't had lunch (even though I threw it up...) he could have done it then and there. He also said that it's common for pregnant women to develop gall stones, and that they only feel safe removing gall bladders during the second trimester, before the growing uterus makes it too difficult to do it laproscopically. Since I'm less than 2 weeks away from my third trimester, time was of the essence.
So I immediately start "fasting" and we plan to do the surgery in about four hours. It's usually an outpatient surgery, but since I'm pregnant they wanted to keep me at least overnight so they could do a continual non-stress test to make sure the baby was alright and that the surgery wouldn't cause me to go into labor. Then, on second thought, the nurse comes back in and says that they want to transfer me to Utah Valley Regional Medical Center, where they have neonatologists and an awesome NICU (the very same one that Caleb stayed at for his first 100 days of life) that could take care of us in the rare chance that this surgery caused the baby to come early. And since I was on morphine, the only way they could send me was via ambulance.
(*Side note: When Nate told the boys that I was going to ride in an ambulance, Caleb said, "NO WAY!" like he was jealous because it was so cool. Russ said, "Oh no!" like he was concerned because I must be really hurt. Those boys are so different! And so funny!*)
Anyway, I end up in L&D at UVRMC. We waited all night to see the on-call surgeon, who wasn't exactly on-call...they tried for hours to reach him, and he just never answered his phone. They would have gone with another surgeon, but Dr. Patterson had already talked to him and gone over my test results and medical history with him, so he "knew" me and my situation. They eventually realized that the surgery wouldn't happen that night, and let me eat a little jello and drink some apple juice. I promptly threw it all up. Nice. The surgeon, Dr. Rasmussen, ended up coming in late that night and talked to me about the risks and benefits of doing the surgery. He basically put the choice in my hands. I felt a little like I would be crazy to opt for the surgery, but crazy not to. It was dangerous either way. If we chose not to do the surgery, it could cause serious problems for my liver and pancreas, or cause me to be in extreme pain for the rest of my pregnancy, and once we got into the third trimester they wouldn't be able to do anything about it without delivering the baby first. If we chose to go with the surgery, it needed to be done ASAP to minimize the chance that they'd have to do a big incision (instead of laproscopic) which would require a longer hospitalization and a much harder recovery. It could also cause me to go into labor and deliver a baby at 26 weeks, which is kind of a big deal! That's even earlier than Caleb, who was born at 27 weeks 1 day! We were to let him know in the morning. So Nate and I talked and prayed about it, and I just felt strongly that I trusted the first doctor's opinion more, and he suggested the surgery right then and there. I felt that the off chance of going into labor, or needing an open incision and longer recovery time, were worth the risk. After all, if I went into labor, they could probably stop it, or at least hold it off for a few weeks. Not to mention, I couldn't spend the rest of my pregnancy dependent on morphine, and there was no way I could handle the pain without it. And then there's the fact that I was completely unable to eat or drink....So surgery was our decision.
Yes, this is my post-surgical belly. All incisions were glued shut. The lower one is the biggest one, and it's about a finger-length above my belly button, and maybe 1.5 inches long. Baby Boy likes to kick it. I don't like that so much. It was pretty badly bruised coming out of surgery. The two on the side are super easy to ignore, and the one on the top gets easily irritated just because of its location, but it's not so bad otherwise.
So they did surgery the next morning! It went well. Four laproscopic incisions. The doctor said my gall bladder was starting to look inflamed. Baby was going nuts afterwards, tons of movement with a good, strong heartbeat. It was all very comforting. Before going into the OR I was feeling like another "gall bladder attack" was coming on, which just confirmed that this surgery was the right choice. And when I came out of the OR, that pain was completely gone. It was replaced by a new pain, the kind you feel after you've been cut open and an internal organ was removed, but that kind of pain is more tolerable because you know that it will improve with time.
Yes, this is my gall bladder and those are the stones. I have no idea if they're as bad as normal, or worse, but you can see two bigger ones and many smaller ones.
They let me order a late lunch, and I didn't throw up! And I haven't thrown up since (although I've been eating really small portions)!
They monitored my little guy all through that night and until they discharged me around noon the next day. He has a really steady heartbeat. I felt like I got to know him better through this. After all, he went through everything right there with me! He's been through a lot for an unborn baby! The heart monitor picked up and magnified his hiccups, and he hiccuped a lot! He also would kick all day long against the monitor, which makes a really loud sound. This kid is gonna have personality, I tell ya. But after all of this, I feel more bonded to him.
Have you ever wondered what the outside of a uterus looks like from inside the abdominal cavity? Wonder no more! That's where my little guy is housed. I'd guess he's just over two pounds right now, and safe and sound inside of his little womb. Awww!
I was discharged after 2 nights and 2.5 days total. Recovering at home has been hard...my lungs hurt, which is a normal part of recovering from an abdominal surgery. I need to cough and breathe deeply, but it just hurts so much! I've got a slight fever, and that first night at home my oxygen levels had me worried. But today I woke up feeling half-way like a functioning human, and tomorrow will be just a little better, so I think I'll be ok. :) We'll see how living a gall bladder-less life effects me...good thing I never really jumped on that bacon bandwagon! It's safe to say I'll be sad if I can never comfortably eat a donut again. So far I haven't had any morning sickness or heartburn. I can't say it has anything to do with the surgery, but hey, I'll take it! There's a good chance that I can go on living without ever thinking of my lack of a gall bladder ever again, and that's the goal.
Thursday, January 22, 2015
20 Weeks!
I'm so glad to be halfway! This has not been an easy pregnancy. From 6-14 weeks, I had pretty bad morning sickness and lost about 5 pounds from throwing up and being unable to eat much of anything. Then at 13.5 weeks I woke in the night with bleeding, and was diagnosed with placental abruption. I proceeded to bleed until I was about 18 weeks. Now I haven't bled for over two weeks and it's been such a relief!
My routine 20-week anatomy ultrasound went well. The baby is super active and measuring just right (two days big, actually). My placenta is low-laying, but there is no placenta previa visible, which is good news. There were two slight abnormalities, though.
First, the ultrasound showed what the doctor described as a "shadow" on the baby's heart. It's called an echogenic focus, and it's basically nothing. My doctor said it's the most common abnormality he sees on ultrasounds. From my research, it sounds like it's a slight calcification in the baby's heart, between the ventricles or by the valve. It sounds like it doesn't affect the function of the heart at all, which is good news. They'll do a follow-up ultrasound later on (the doctor said 32-34 weeks) and if it hasn't resolved then we'll just have to notify the pediatrician when he's born and they may or may not want to do an EKG later on. Thanks to Dr. Google, I found out that an echogenic focus is a marker for chromosomal anomalies, such as Down Syndrome. There are many markers for DS that can be seen on an ultrasound, so having one marker shouldn't be significant, especially since I'm not of "advanced maternal age." But having a perfectly clear ultrasound in no way guarantees that your baby will have healthy chromosomes anyhow. So it's probably nothing, but now chromosome problems are on my mind and I probably won't rest entirely easy until the baby is born.
The other problem seen on the ultrasound is my amniotic fluid. The fluid levels are fine, but it's very...dirty. It looks like bleeding for five weeks straight leaves lots of "particles" floating around in the fluid. If you've ever seen an ultrasound, you know that the black spaces around the baby are anmiotic fluid. My black spaces looked like they were filled with layers of glitter floating around. You could literally see them bouncing off of the walls. It was honestly a little alarming to me. The ultrasound tech said that we'd need an ultrasound in a month to follow up, but the doctor wants me to have another ultrasound to measure my cervical length at 26 weeks (you know, to make sure I'm not at risk of dilating early again) so they'll just check the amniotic fluid at that time. The tech did say that she has no reason to believe that the dirty appearance is due to infection, so she would guess it's because of the bleeding...and while I agree with her, just hearing the word "infection" freaks me out. We have reason to believe that Caleb was born 13 weeks early because my placenta was infected with strep and staph. It would have killed him had he not been born when he was. So naturally it scares me to think that there's even a slight possibility of an infection. When Caleb started getting sick from the infection he stopped kicking (which was my only indication that anything was wrong, even though I was dilated to 4cm by that time and hadn't had a single contraction), so you can bet that I'm going to be hyper aware of this baby's level of activity. So far he moves around more often than not--he's so active! So that's very comforting. If that doesn't keep up, I'm going to be calling my OB right away!
Those were the only concerns arising from the ultrasound.
Otherwise, I've been feeling much better. I still throw up from time to time, first thing in the morning (it's always taking a sip of water with my medicine that puts me over the edge and sends me to bend over the porcelain throne, even when I eat a few bites of bland cereal before getting up). The difference between the nausea and vomiting between the first trimester and now is that now the urge to throw up comes on super suddenly, and once I throw up I feel better immediately. In the first trimester, I would feel on the verge of vomiting for 12 hours before throwing up, and throwing up never provided relief. It was pretty bad. Now I honestly can't complain. It's not so bad at all. I still take zofran maybe four times a week to control the nausea, but even that is perfectly fine with me.
My cramps have also decreased drastically. They were awful the week of Christmas, when I was out and about more than usual at family gatherings. Time spent in the car brought on cramps so awful that I ended up downloading a contraction timing app. There were a few scary moments there! But once Christmas was over the cramps went away almost entirely. I credit the weekly progesterone shots, honestly. They're designed to prevent preterm labor, and I think that's just what they're doing! I started them the week before Christmas, so it seems that it took about a week and a half to get in my system and now they're doing their job! Yay! I'm still having plenty of braxton hicks contractions, but those don't worry me like the cramps did.
I feel much more stable now that I'm not bleeding or cramping. I've even allowed myself to be more active (I actually walked through a few stores in the past week) and I haven't had any problems! I can tell spending over 5 weeks laying low has weakened my muscles a lot, so it'll take a while to build up my stamina, but I'm glad that I'll be able to be mostly back to normal before long, with the main exception of heavy lifting.
I've also seen a decrease in heartburn recently (weird) and instead of my hair getting thicker, it's falling out more and more (I don't mind, because I have way too much hair as it is, but it's not "normal" for pregnancy, and I'm a little concerned about my thyroid levels, which have yet to be checked this trimester). I don't have any overpowering food cravings, but I have aversions to ham and mints. Yuck...just the though of mints...just no. Since I'm able to eat pretty much anything these days, I've finally put on about 5 pounds in addition to gaining back the weight that I had lost. And the best part of this pregnancy? My mood is perfectly normal. With my first two, I had awful and unpredictable mood swings. I got mad at the littlest things. I hated the sound of crying babies and whining children...I seriously hated kids during my first two pregnancies. Now I feel like I actually have control of my moods, which is the most incredible thing! I'm a functioning person (unlike before), and it feels great. :)
My routine 20-week anatomy ultrasound went well. The baby is super active and measuring just right (two days big, actually). My placenta is low-laying, but there is no placenta previa visible, which is good news. There were two slight abnormalities, though.
First, the ultrasound showed what the doctor described as a "shadow" on the baby's heart. It's called an echogenic focus, and it's basically nothing. My doctor said it's the most common abnormality he sees on ultrasounds. From my research, it sounds like it's a slight calcification in the baby's heart, between the ventricles or by the valve. It sounds like it doesn't affect the function of the heart at all, which is good news. They'll do a follow-up ultrasound later on (the doctor said 32-34 weeks) and if it hasn't resolved then we'll just have to notify the pediatrician when he's born and they may or may not want to do an EKG later on. Thanks to Dr. Google, I found out that an echogenic focus is a marker for chromosomal anomalies, such as Down Syndrome. There are many markers for DS that can be seen on an ultrasound, so having one marker shouldn't be significant, especially since I'm not of "advanced maternal age." But having a perfectly clear ultrasound in no way guarantees that your baby will have healthy chromosomes anyhow. So it's probably nothing, but now chromosome problems are on my mind and I probably won't rest entirely easy until the baby is born.
The other problem seen on the ultrasound is my amniotic fluid. The fluid levels are fine, but it's very...dirty. It looks like bleeding for five weeks straight leaves lots of "particles" floating around in the fluid. If you've ever seen an ultrasound, you know that the black spaces around the baby are anmiotic fluid. My black spaces looked like they were filled with layers of glitter floating around. You could literally see them bouncing off of the walls. It was honestly a little alarming to me. The ultrasound tech said that we'd need an ultrasound in a month to follow up, but the doctor wants me to have another ultrasound to measure my cervical length at 26 weeks (you know, to make sure I'm not at risk of dilating early again) so they'll just check the amniotic fluid at that time. The tech did say that she has no reason to believe that the dirty appearance is due to infection, so she would guess it's because of the bleeding...and while I agree with her, just hearing the word "infection" freaks me out. We have reason to believe that Caleb was born 13 weeks early because my placenta was infected with strep and staph. It would have killed him had he not been born when he was. So naturally it scares me to think that there's even a slight possibility of an infection. When Caleb started getting sick from the infection he stopped kicking (which was my only indication that anything was wrong, even though I was dilated to 4cm by that time and hadn't had a single contraction), so you can bet that I'm going to be hyper aware of this baby's level of activity. So far he moves around more often than not--he's so active! So that's very comforting. If that doesn't keep up, I'm going to be calling my OB right away!
Those were the only concerns arising from the ultrasound.
Otherwise, I've been feeling much better. I still throw up from time to time, first thing in the morning (it's always taking a sip of water with my medicine that puts me over the edge and sends me to bend over the porcelain throne, even when I eat a few bites of bland cereal before getting up). The difference between the nausea and vomiting between the first trimester and now is that now the urge to throw up comes on super suddenly, and once I throw up I feel better immediately. In the first trimester, I would feel on the verge of vomiting for 12 hours before throwing up, and throwing up never provided relief. It was pretty bad. Now I honestly can't complain. It's not so bad at all. I still take zofran maybe four times a week to control the nausea, but even that is perfectly fine with me.
My cramps have also decreased drastically. They were awful the week of Christmas, when I was out and about more than usual at family gatherings. Time spent in the car brought on cramps so awful that I ended up downloading a contraction timing app. There were a few scary moments there! But once Christmas was over the cramps went away almost entirely. I credit the weekly progesterone shots, honestly. They're designed to prevent preterm labor, and I think that's just what they're doing! I started them the week before Christmas, so it seems that it took about a week and a half to get in my system and now they're doing their job! Yay! I'm still having plenty of braxton hicks contractions, but those don't worry me like the cramps did.
I feel much more stable now that I'm not bleeding or cramping. I've even allowed myself to be more active (I actually walked through a few stores in the past week) and I haven't had any problems! I can tell spending over 5 weeks laying low has weakened my muscles a lot, so it'll take a while to build up my stamina, but I'm glad that I'll be able to be mostly back to normal before long, with the main exception of heavy lifting.
I've also seen a decrease in heartburn recently (weird) and instead of my hair getting thicker, it's falling out more and more (I don't mind, because I have way too much hair as it is, but it's not "normal" for pregnancy, and I'm a little concerned about my thyroid levels, which have yet to be checked this trimester). I don't have any overpowering food cravings, but I have aversions to ham and mints. Yuck...just the though of mints...just no. Since I'm able to eat pretty much anything these days, I've finally put on about 5 pounds in addition to gaining back the weight that I had lost. And the best part of this pregnancy? My mood is perfectly normal. With my first two, I had awful and unpredictable mood swings. I got mad at the littlest things. I hated the sound of crying babies and whining children...I seriously hated kids during my first two pregnancies. Now I feel like I actually have control of my moods, which is the most incredible thing! I'm a functioning person (unlike before), and it feels great. :)
17 weeks
18 weeks 2 days
1 day shy of 19 weeks
My little boy at 20 weeks 1 day. Is that a smile I see? <3 p="">
Wednesday, December 17, 2014
Pregnancy Update: 15 weeks 3 days
I had an ultrasound today and it appears I have three separate (yet likely related) things going on.
1) I have a placental abruption, where my placenta is separated partially from the uterine wall, which has been actively bleeding for two weeks now;
2) a subchorionic hemorrhage, where there is a hemorrhage (or possibly a blood clot) between the wall of my uterus and the amniotic sack (I could literally see a sizable bubble in there); and
3) partial placenta previa, where my placenta is partially covering the cervical opening.
This could get complicated, but since my bleeding appears to be stable (even though it hasn't stopped), hopefully it'll just clear up eventually and not be an issue. If the bleeding gets worse by the time the baby is viable (24 weeks) then I'll end up on hospital bed rest. Worst case scenario, the bleeding gets so bad that they have to deliver the baby super early to save its life. The placenta is kinda vital to the baby's survival. ;) For now, I'm going to "take it easy" as much as possible and only do the most necessary daily tasks in hopes that the bleeding stops, or at least doesn't get worse.
Also, the placenta previa could be a big deal (it could be the reason I'm bleeding), and it could eventually cause me to need a c-section. But since it's not a "complete" previa, there's a good chance the placenta will migrate upward as my uterus stretches and grows. They were taking so many measurements of my placenta because it was super long. So I guess it's just kinda getting in the way. But once the uterus gets bigger, it'll hopefully move away from the cervical opening and it won't be an issue.
So there it is. A lot of wait-and-seeing. And hoping that this bleeding and these cramps go away. I started my weekly 17p (progesterone) shots today, which are supposed to keep me from going into early labor (I took them with my last pregnancy as a precaution since Caleb was born so early), so we'll have to see if that helps with the cramps.
Alright, I'm off to "take it easy" some more.
Oh yeah, and we found out today that...
IT'S A BOY!
I seriously couldn't be more excited about the prospect of having three little boys. It's gonna be awesome. Every day is gonna be a party at our house. :D
1) I have a placental abruption, where my placenta is separated partially from the uterine wall, which has been actively bleeding for two weeks now;
2) a subchorionic hemorrhage, where there is a hemorrhage (or possibly a blood clot) between the wall of my uterus and the amniotic sack (I could literally see a sizable bubble in there); and
3) partial placenta previa, where my placenta is partially covering the cervical opening.
This could get complicated, but since my bleeding appears to be stable (even though it hasn't stopped), hopefully it'll just clear up eventually and not be an issue. If the bleeding gets worse by the time the baby is viable (24 weeks) then I'll end up on hospital bed rest. Worst case scenario, the bleeding gets so bad that they have to deliver the baby super early to save its life. The placenta is kinda vital to the baby's survival. ;) For now, I'm going to "take it easy" as much as possible and only do the most necessary daily tasks in hopes that the bleeding stops, or at least doesn't get worse.
Also, the placenta previa could be a big deal (it could be the reason I'm bleeding), and it could eventually cause me to need a c-section. But since it's not a "complete" previa, there's a good chance the placenta will migrate upward as my uterus stretches and grows. They were taking so many measurements of my placenta because it was super long. So I guess it's just kinda getting in the way. But once the uterus gets bigger, it'll hopefully move away from the cervical opening and it won't be an issue.
So there it is. A lot of wait-and-seeing. And hoping that this bleeding and these cramps go away. I started my weekly 17p (progesterone) shots today, which are supposed to keep me from going into early labor (I took them with my last pregnancy as a precaution since Caleb was born so early), so we'll have to see if that helps with the cramps.
Alright, I'm off to "take it easy" some more.
Oh yeah, and we found out today that...
IT'S A BOY!
I seriously couldn't be more excited about the prospect of having three little boys. It's gonna be awesome. Every day is gonna be a party at our house. :D
Saturday, December 13, 2014
First Trimester Placental Abruption
This blog post will have lots of details that may gross you out. It goes along with my policy of "if it's medical, it's not personal." Be warned.
Thursday morning, December 4th, I was exactly 13 weeks 4 days. It was around 3:30 AM when I awoke feeling like I was wetting my pants (see, personal details already). I was a little embarrassed, thinking this is waaaay too early in my pregnancy for that to start, right? I mean, it's not like I have 6+ pounds sitting on my bladder. So I got out of bed and felt a gush. I was like, seriously? Can I not control my bladder? So I went to use the toilet and was pretty darn alarmed at what I saw. There was blood. So much blood. In my pants, turning the water red. Blood everywhere. It seemed kind of watery, too. But then there was a blood clot, not huge, but certainly big enough to be alarming. Oh crap, I think I may be having a miscarriage.
So I got cleaned up and woke Nate up. I told him that if I start having cramps then I'm going in to the ER (after all, bleeding, blood clots, and cramps are symptoms that are pretty hard to ignore). At that moment I felt a tiny cramp, so I was like, "I'm going." Of course, it's 3:30 in the morning, so who would we call to watch our kids?? We decided that Nate would stay home and I'd drive myself to the hospital.
They were able to get me back for an ultrasound after not too long of a wait. The ultrasound tech didn't let me see the ultrasound much at all, but after a minute of taking a look at things he said, "It's squirming around in there." Whew! What a relief! He was also extremely surprised that I was only 13 weeks (and 3 days) because the baby was consistently measuring at 14 weeks. He also informed me that I have a posterior placenta (it's implanted on the back of my uterus). Good to know.
So after taking a look at a bunch of things, he brought me back to my ER room and they started an IV. Or I should say, they tried to start an IV. They were successful on their third try. It turns out my forearms have deceptively nice-looking veins, but they blow extremely easily. I'll be warning anyone else who ever tries to put an IV in my forearm.
This is how it looked almost 9 days later. I also recall how it took three tries to get an IV in my forearm when I had my tonsils out. So after five total attempts in my lifetime, only one of those attempts was successful. Yes, I think I'll have them stick to my elbow joints from now on.
To make a long story short, the doctor eventually came in and told me that I had a mild placental abruption. My placenta is partially detached from the uterine wall, which shouldn't happen until after the baby is delivered. He said it could bleed for a bit, then reattach itself and heal. Or it could detach more and more until I miscarry. He said to go home and stay on bed rest until I could follow up with my regular OBGYN within the next week. He was very kind about it, but basically told me not to come back unless I was losing so much blood that I was dizzy. There's really nothing the ER could do about a miscarriage, anyway.
So I made it home around 6:30 AM feeling very relieved that my baby was still alive and glad that there was something I could do to protect him/her.
So I stayed on bed rest, with the bleeding getting better and worse and better and worse. Literally every other day. I could periodically feel my uterus contract and stay rock hard for a few minutes, but I never had any cramps. Judging by my still-existent nausea and the fact that I could literally feel the top of my uterus growing higher and higher each day, I knew my baby was still ok in there. All the while, Nate did a seriously amazing job taking care of the boys and me.
I saw my regular OB on the next Tuesday. Well, I saw the nurse anyway (the OB had just left for a delivery). We located the heartbeat (always a relief) and she told me that there's a pretty good chance that the baby will be ok. She gave me a 90 percent chance that the bleeding will stop on its own and the pregnancy will proceed as normal. She wanted to wait for two weeks after the beginning of the bleeding before doing an ultrasound, to give my placenta a chance to fully heal. She also said I didn't need to be on strict bed rest, but "modified bed rest," where I can be up and about and doing things, but don't do more than what's necessary and most importantly don't do any lifting (no more than about 6 pounds, she said). Also pelvic rest.
Since going from strict bed rest to modified bed rest, I have been having loads of cramps. As of today the bleeding still hasn't stopped, but it hasn't gotten worse, so I'm taking that as a good sign. But the cramps are quite painful, and since my placenta is posterior, I get awful lower back cramps. And then there's the overall soreness associated with placental abruption. My abdomen is just plain sore. Really sore. And then there's the 10-minute-long contractions that I get when I do something as simple as bend over. That was pretty "normal" for me when I was pregnant with Russell, so I was expecting it this time around. But I sure hope that that doesn't harm my placenta any farther.
Also, oddly enough, the bleeding is always worst first thing in the morning. I don't know if the baby likes to kick his/her placenta all night long or what, but after a day of milling around the house things always seem slightly better (except for those darn cramps).
So now we wait. There's a slight chance that the bleeding won't ever stop and then we'll just have to hope that it doesn't get any worse until I can deliver. If that's the case, I'll be lucky if I can go full-term. So let's just hope that it resolves!
I'll keep ya posted.
Friday, December 12, 2014
One Trimester Down, hopefully two to go!
I'm glad to have that first trimester over with. It wasn't my favorite. Here's a little run-down of what it was like:
I felt awesome until I was 5 weeks and 6 days pregnant. That's when the morning sickness came on strong. I started out throwing up an average of twice a week. Not so bad, really, except that I wasn't able to eat much. I went through a few different cravings (not so much cravings, really, but more like things that I thought I could stomach better than other food). Raisin bread toast with butter, orange soda, and summer sausage are what I lived on for a while. If I tried eating other things, I usually felt like the food was stuck in my throat for about 10 hours before throwing up. It was soooo rough.
I ended up losing 5 or 6 pounds, and haven't gained any of it back yet.
I couldn't walk through a grocery store without looking for a place to throw up. The sight of all of that food...it was just too much.
I realized just how much Nate thinks about and talks about food. He would try to tell me what free lunch he got at work that day, and I'd have to cut him off for fear of tossing my proverbial cookies right then and there at the thought of food. It was pretty bad. And it happened at least once a day. I had to scroll through my facebook news feed extra fast so as to avoid seeing any pictures my friends shared of food. I just couldn't handle it!
I required a lot of medications...zofran, phenergan, vitamin B6, unisom, zantac, tylenol, colace, and mirilax (which I could have sworn didn't have a taste until I became pregnant). Ugh. I hate taking medication, but I seriously needed it for survival.
As far as pregnancy symptoms go, my list was short this time, compared to my first two pregnancies. Yes, the nausea and vomiting was pretty miserable, but that, constipation (also miserable) and post nasal drip are pretty much all I've dealt with, with a little heartburn/reflux thrown in there. I'm so relieved to not have the mood swings that haunted me with my boys. I still feel like myself! It's amazing. I get headaches from time to time, but they're well controlled with a tylenol or two, which is nothing compared to how debilitating they were with my first two pregnancies. SO glad to not have that to deal with (knock on wood).
Now let's talk more about the post nasal drip. I remember having a stuffy nose through my whole pregnancy with Russell, and I thought that was no fun. HA! This time I have had so much mucus draining from my sinuses down the back of my throat that TWICE I would try to swallow a pill and it would get STUCK! Talk about gross! I'm supposed to take my thyroid pill on an empty stomach every morning, but I had to eat something first to try to clear my throat. And even then it got stuck! Thankfully thyroid pills aren't bitter, because it ended up back in my mouth. Gag. The other pill that got stuck...that one was pretty nasty tasting when partially dissolved. I can tell that my gag reflex has eased up a bit, because I can talk about it now. At the time, just thinking about it was enough to make me hurl! And then there were the many times where I would just try to breathe, and the mucus would be overwhelming and I'd almost throw up.
I also caught a 24-hour stomach virus that our whole family got, but I got it worse than anyone by far. I ended up throwing up about 15 times (if you include dry heaving) in half a day and couldn't keep down even a sip of gatorade. So to the ER I went. The fluids and IV zofran helped immensely and I was all better by the next day.
These days, my favorite thing in the world is pears. Canned pears are my favorite. I drink the juice with a straw. Yummmm! It's good for hydration and fiber, two things that I really need. Otherwise, it seems that the cravings and aversions have eased up a ton. I can kinda just eat whatever, as long as I don't eat a ton of anything (it makes me sick). I also have to eat constantly. I'm talkin' if I go more than 30 minutes without eating, I had better pop a cookie in my mouth ASAP to get my blood sugar back up before I get so sick that I can't eat anything. It's so odd. I've learned to keep oatmeal squares (the cereal) around, as well as pretzels. And little chewy candies are also good to pick me up when I'm on the verge of being sick. Skittles and sour patch kids are what I've been using lately, and they've helped a lot.
Now, right at the end of this rough trimester is when I had my little placental abruption drama goin' on, but seeing as this is getting pretty long already, that deserves a post of its own. Stay tuned.
One day shy of 10 weeks:
One day shy of 12 weeks:
One day shy of 13 weeks:
I only take pictures on Sundays when I'm actually dressed nicely (usually the only day of the week where I'm dressed nicely). My due date is on a Monday, so my pictures will always be one day shy of whatever week that is. Aaaaand, I've been hanging out in pjs since the abruption, so I promise, next time I'm actually wearing real clothes, showered, and wearing maybe a little bit of makeup, I'll snap a picture. But it might be a while. Sorry/not sorry. You should try wearing pajamas for a week straight. It's kinda awesome.
I felt awesome until I was 5 weeks and 6 days pregnant. That's when the morning sickness came on strong. I started out throwing up an average of twice a week. Not so bad, really, except that I wasn't able to eat much. I went through a few different cravings (not so much cravings, really, but more like things that I thought I could stomach better than other food). Raisin bread toast with butter, orange soda, and summer sausage are what I lived on for a while. If I tried eating other things, I usually felt like the food was stuck in my throat for about 10 hours before throwing up. It was soooo rough.
I ended up losing 5 or 6 pounds, and haven't gained any of it back yet.
I couldn't walk through a grocery store without looking for a place to throw up. The sight of all of that food...it was just too much.
I realized just how much Nate thinks about and talks about food. He would try to tell me what free lunch he got at work that day, and I'd have to cut him off for fear of tossing my proverbial cookies right then and there at the thought of food. It was pretty bad. And it happened at least once a day. I had to scroll through my facebook news feed extra fast so as to avoid seeing any pictures my friends shared of food. I just couldn't handle it!
I required a lot of medications...zofran, phenergan, vitamin B6, unisom, zantac, tylenol, colace, and mirilax (which I could have sworn didn't have a taste until I became pregnant). Ugh. I hate taking medication, but I seriously needed it for survival.
As far as pregnancy symptoms go, my list was short this time, compared to my first two pregnancies. Yes, the nausea and vomiting was pretty miserable, but that, constipation (also miserable) and post nasal drip are pretty much all I've dealt with, with a little heartburn/reflux thrown in there. I'm so relieved to not have the mood swings that haunted me with my boys. I still feel like myself! It's amazing. I get headaches from time to time, but they're well controlled with a tylenol or two, which is nothing compared to how debilitating they were with my first two pregnancies. SO glad to not have that to deal with (knock on wood).
Now let's talk more about the post nasal drip. I remember having a stuffy nose through my whole pregnancy with Russell, and I thought that was no fun. HA! This time I have had so much mucus draining from my sinuses down the back of my throat that TWICE I would try to swallow a pill and it would get STUCK! Talk about gross! I'm supposed to take my thyroid pill on an empty stomach every morning, but I had to eat something first to try to clear my throat. And even then it got stuck! Thankfully thyroid pills aren't bitter, because it ended up back in my mouth. Gag. The other pill that got stuck...that one was pretty nasty tasting when partially dissolved. I can tell that my gag reflex has eased up a bit, because I can talk about it now. At the time, just thinking about it was enough to make me hurl! And then there were the many times where I would just try to breathe, and the mucus would be overwhelming and I'd almost throw up.
I also caught a 24-hour stomach virus that our whole family got, but I got it worse than anyone by far. I ended up throwing up about 15 times (if you include dry heaving) in half a day and couldn't keep down even a sip of gatorade. So to the ER I went. The fluids and IV zofran helped immensely and I was all better by the next day.
These days, my favorite thing in the world is pears. Canned pears are my favorite. I drink the juice with a straw. Yummmm! It's good for hydration and fiber, two things that I really need. Otherwise, it seems that the cravings and aversions have eased up a ton. I can kinda just eat whatever, as long as I don't eat a ton of anything (it makes me sick). I also have to eat constantly. I'm talkin' if I go more than 30 minutes without eating, I had better pop a cookie in my mouth ASAP to get my blood sugar back up before I get so sick that I can't eat anything. It's so odd. I've learned to keep oatmeal squares (the cereal) around, as well as pretzels. And little chewy candies are also good to pick me up when I'm on the verge of being sick. Skittles and sour patch kids are what I've been using lately, and they've helped a lot.
Now, right at the end of this rough trimester is when I had my little placental abruption drama goin' on, but seeing as this is getting pretty long already, that deserves a post of its own. Stay tuned.
One day shy of 10 weeks:
One day shy of 12 weeks:
One day shy of 13 weeks:
I only take pictures on Sundays when I'm actually dressed nicely (usually the only day of the week where I'm dressed nicely). My due date is on a Monday, so my pictures will always be one day shy of whatever week that is. Aaaaand, I've been hanging out in pjs since the abruption, so I promise, next time I'm actually wearing real clothes, showered, and wearing maybe a little bit of makeup, I'll snap a picture. But it might be a while. Sorry/not sorry. You should try wearing pajamas for a week straight. It's kinda awesome.
Wednesday, October 29, 2014
Say WHAT?
We've got another baby on the way!!
The newest Purser is due June 8th!
And now, since I'm sure you're all dying to know but don't want to ask, let me give you details:
How did this come about? Getting pregnant is a very medical process for me. This time it took a total of 12 months. That's a whole year of people awkwardly looking at my belly as if waiting for a pregnancy announcement, since, of course, Russell is nearing his third birthday and by the time Caleb was that age we had a 9-month-old. Sorry, but my little belly was just leftovers after the number Russ did on my abs. (BTW, my doctor said I'll need surgery to fix my torn abs, so I'm going to look 3 months pregnant until that happens, so it's ok to stop staring.)
With Caleb it took 15 months and with Russ it took 2 months, both requiring 200 mg of clomid to get me to ovulate. This time I went on clomid for three months, ovulating each time and still not getting pregnant. That's the maximum that my doctor felt comfortable keeping me on that level of hormones, so he referred me to a reproductive endocrinologist (RE). They ran some tests and found that I have a blocked fallopian tube. My "good" tube initially appeared to be blocked as well, but after putting some pressure on it the radiologist was able to get it to clear out. The RE prescribed a different fertility med and after getting my fallopian tube cleared out, I got pregnant right away! Which is a very good thing, because the next step would have been hormone injections, which greatly increases your chance of multiples. I'm scared to death of having multiples, with my high-risk status and with the high likelihood of my kids having growth and feeding problems.
Wait...how many are there? Just one. :) We've already had two ultrasounds at the RE to confirm that it's not ectopic, to see how many babies are there, and to detect a heartbeat. Just one little baby in there, measuring right on track, with a good, strong heartbeat.
How have you been feeling? Sick. I spent the first few weeks feeling awesome, and then right at 6 weeks I got super sick and have been sick ever since. So far I've broken all my previous records for how many times in a pregnancy I've thrown up--4 times so far. And I'm sure it's not over. I have a few good hours here and there, but I've pretty much just held down the couch for the last two weeks. Thankfully, my boys have been awesome. Caleb and Russ play together nicely all day, and Nate makes dinner, does the shopping (I tried to go to the store yesterday and had to keep my eyes on the floor...just looking at all of that food made me sick), and cleans the house. They're all awesome and deserve gold stars.
I'm also exhausted and need at LEAST one nap a day.
That's about it for pregnancy symptoms...just nausea, vomiting, and tiredness. Oh, and I've lost weight since the nausea is keeping me from being able to eat much, but you'd never know since my belly is popping out already. But it's not the cute, hard, round belly, uh-uh, it's the flabby chubby belly. Not my favorite part of pregnancy. I'm excited to actually start showing.
How did the big brothers take the news? They literally started jumping up and down, shouting, "YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY!" Caleb tells me every day how he really wants it to be a girl, because we already have three boys and only one girl in our family. Russell asks every day if it has teeth yet (tooth buds will be forming this month!). They absolutely love telling people--they say "Mommy has a baby!" I suggested that maybe the boys can share a room and the baby can have the other room, and Russell said he wanted to share a room with the baby. They talk about the baby all of the time! I can confidently say that they are going to be amazing big brothers.
So, a June birthday, eh? How do you feel about that? Well, thanks for asking! ;) I always wanted to avoid summer birthdays, because I don't want my kids to be the youngest in their class. But when it takes you 12 months to get pregnant, you take whatever you can get! And there are some really nice things about having a baby in June, too. It's not the middle of flu and sick season, which will be awesome after having two babies in the dead of winter and having to quarantine ourselves. And perhaps the one I'm most excited about: the sun. Ever since having Russ in December, I've had Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) every winter. It's awful. And combine that with the baby blues? It seriously took me over 4 months to bond with Russell. I'm looking forward to having lots of sun and nice, long days to keep my mood in a good place. And as far as being pregnant for a whole winter...I'm going to have to get a UV lamp to try to combat the SAD. Seriously, pregnancy hormones (and post-pregnancy hormones) aren't good to my mood.
Any goals for this pregnancy? Well, now that I know I can go to full-term, my goal is to have a 9-pounder. ;) I've come to accept that my children will always have a hard time growing and are likely to have problems with food allergies/intolerances/reactions, so I want to give this baby the best chance possible at being big! Russ was 8lbs 5oz at birth, was Failure to Thrive by 4 days old, and was completely below the charts by 6 months. So I want to give this baby the best chance possible by starting out bigger than ever! 9 pounds sounds good to me.
I also want to deliver without more than three pushes. ;) After a difficult delivery with short, fat, posterior Russell, my doctor guaranteed me that my next baby's delivery would be a breeze. I'm holding him to it (even though I switched doctors). I can have a 9-pounder with three pushes or less, right? It may be wishful thinking, but it's on my "wants" list.
And there you have it. Our third baby is on the way and we couldn't be more excited!
The newest Purser is due June 8th!
And now, since I'm sure you're all dying to know but don't want to ask, let me give you details:
How did this come about? Getting pregnant is a very medical process for me. This time it took a total of 12 months. That's a whole year of people awkwardly looking at my belly as if waiting for a pregnancy announcement, since, of course, Russell is nearing his third birthday and by the time Caleb was that age we had a 9-month-old. Sorry, but my little belly was just leftovers after the number Russ did on my abs. (BTW, my doctor said I'll need surgery to fix my torn abs, so I'm going to look 3 months pregnant until that happens, so it's ok to stop staring.)
With Caleb it took 15 months and with Russ it took 2 months, both requiring 200 mg of clomid to get me to ovulate. This time I went on clomid for three months, ovulating each time and still not getting pregnant. That's the maximum that my doctor felt comfortable keeping me on that level of hormones, so he referred me to a reproductive endocrinologist (RE). They ran some tests and found that I have a blocked fallopian tube. My "good" tube initially appeared to be blocked as well, but after putting some pressure on it the radiologist was able to get it to clear out. The RE prescribed a different fertility med and after getting my fallopian tube cleared out, I got pregnant right away! Which is a very good thing, because the next step would have been hormone injections, which greatly increases your chance of multiples. I'm scared to death of having multiples, with my high-risk status and with the high likelihood of my kids having growth and feeding problems.
Wait...how many are there? Just one. :) We've already had two ultrasounds at the RE to confirm that it's not ectopic, to see how many babies are there, and to detect a heartbeat. Just one little baby in there, measuring right on track, with a good, strong heartbeat.
How have you been feeling? Sick. I spent the first few weeks feeling awesome, and then right at 6 weeks I got super sick and have been sick ever since. So far I've broken all my previous records for how many times in a pregnancy I've thrown up--4 times so far. And I'm sure it's not over. I have a few good hours here and there, but I've pretty much just held down the couch for the last two weeks. Thankfully, my boys have been awesome. Caleb and Russ play together nicely all day, and Nate makes dinner, does the shopping (I tried to go to the store yesterday and had to keep my eyes on the floor...just looking at all of that food made me sick), and cleans the house. They're all awesome and deserve gold stars.
I'm also exhausted and need at LEAST one nap a day.
That's about it for pregnancy symptoms...just nausea, vomiting, and tiredness. Oh, and I've lost weight since the nausea is keeping me from being able to eat much, but you'd never know since my belly is popping out already. But it's not the cute, hard, round belly, uh-uh, it's the flabby chubby belly. Not my favorite part of pregnancy. I'm excited to actually start showing.
How did the big brothers take the news? They literally started jumping up and down, shouting, "YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY!" Caleb tells me every day how he really wants it to be a girl, because we already have three boys and only one girl in our family. Russell asks every day if it has teeth yet (tooth buds will be forming this month!). They absolutely love telling people--they say "Mommy has a baby!" I suggested that maybe the boys can share a room and the baby can have the other room, and Russell said he wanted to share a room with the baby. They talk about the baby all of the time! I can confidently say that they are going to be amazing big brothers.
So, a June birthday, eh? How do you feel about that? Well, thanks for asking! ;) I always wanted to avoid summer birthdays, because I don't want my kids to be the youngest in their class. But when it takes you 12 months to get pregnant, you take whatever you can get! And there are some really nice things about having a baby in June, too. It's not the middle of flu and sick season, which will be awesome after having two babies in the dead of winter and having to quarantine ourselves. And perhaps the one I'm most excited about: the sun. Ever since having Russ in December, I've had Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) every winter. It's awful. And combine that with the baby blues? It seriously took me over 4 months to bond with Russell. I'm looking forward to having lots of sun and nice, long days to keep my mood in a good place. And as far as being pregnant for a whole winter...I'm going to have to get a UV lamp to try to combat the SAD. Seriously, pregnancy hormones (and post-pregnancy hormones) aren't good to my mood.
Any goals for this pregnancy? Well, now that I know I can go to full-term, my goal is to have a 9-pounder. ;) I've come to accept that my children will always have a hard time growing and are likely to have problems with food allergies/intolerances/reactions, so I want to give this baby the best chance possible at being big! Russ was 8lbs 5oz at birth, was Failure to Thrive by 4 days old, and was completely below the charts by 6 months. So I want to give this baby the best chance possible by starting out bigger than ever! 9 pounds sounds good to me.
I also want to deliver without more than three pushes. ;) After a difficult delivery with short, fat, posterior Russell, my doctor guaranteed me that my next baby's delivery would be a breeze. I'm holding him to it (even though I switched doctors). I can have a 9-pounder with three pushes or less, right? It may be wishful thinking, but it's on my "wants" list.
And there you have it. Our third baby is on the way and we couldn't be more excited!
Thursday, August 8, 2013
In case you were wondering...
Here are some unexpected details regarding delivering a premature baby:
First off, you don't get to make a lot of decisions. No one ever asked me if I wanted an epidural. They just gave me one. They don't ask if you want your water broken, or how you feel about pitocin. If it's necessary, it happens. They certainly weren't about to ask me how I felt about a c-section. They were ready to do it, in case it was necessary to save my baby's life.
As soon as he was born, they took him away to put him on life support. They said it was my husband's job to go with him, and leave me in the OR with just a doctor and a nurse or two. That I'd see him when things settled down a bit. I didn't question it. I didn't even think about how it would feel to not see my baby, or to be left alone. In that situation, feelings don't matter. It's all survival mode. Literal survival mode. Please save my baby, and do it fast.
After I got to spend a few minutes with my new tiny baby (while he was getting his very first IV put in...aww! I got to experience a "first" already!), the first thing I had to do was sign a paper saying that if I didn't pump enough milk for him then they could use human milk bank milk. That was the very first matter of business. That is how important breast milk was to his tiny, underdeveloped, immature digestive system. I gladly signed it, even though I didn't know before that moment that there was such a thing as a human milk bank.
Then, a few hours later, a lactation consultant came to my room with a pump and asked if I wanted to pump and eventually try to breastfeed my baby. Uh...of course...you mean I can breastfeed him? But holy cow (no pun intended), I was not mentally prepared for that. You mean...just how does this work? Oh, so you're going to help me? Great...let's just throw privacy and propriety out the window then. But eventually I got to the point where half the medical professionals in Utah County had seen me try to breastfeed my baby and I hardly felt the need for a shirt when I was in the NICU. Ok, that's a slight exaggeration, but still. It was just a fact of NICU life.
Then, later that same day, there were two different people who came to my hospital room to request our participation in medical studies. Who knew, right? The very day I delivered a baby at 27 weeks. He didn't even have a name yet! One requested a whole vial of my saliva, and a swab of the inside of Caleb's cheek, to try to determine a genetic link behind prematurity. The other wanted to pull a card out of an envelope to determine if Caleb would go on a "high flow nasal canula" or a "continuous positive airway pressure (CPAP)" machine when he was ready to be taken off of the ventilator, to determine if one showed better results overall. He was chosen for the high flow nasal canula, in case you were wondering, but he eventually ended up using both at separate times. I never heard of the results of either of those studies. Nor the study that they did a month or so later, trialing a machine that monitors oxygen flow to the brain. But of course I wasn't going to turn down the chance to participate in these studies. Anything to help out babies to come.
And those were the unique experiences surrounding the delivery of a premature baby. Those are all things that seemed so small, but absolutely did not happen when I delivered a healthy baby.
If you're interested in seeing the whole story behind Caleb's crazy entrance into the world, here it is.
First off, you don't get to make a lot of decisions. No one ever asked me if I wanted an epidural. They just gave me one. They don't ask if you want your water broken, or how you feel about pitocin. If it's necessary, it happens. They certainly weren't about to ask me how I felt about a c-section. They were ready to do it, in case it was necessary to save my baby's life.
As soon as he was born, they took him away to put him on life support. They said it was my husband's job to go with him, and leave me in the OR with just a doctor and a nurse or two. That I'd see him when things settled down a bit. I didn't question it. I didn't even think about how it would feel to not see my baby, or to be left alone. In that situation, feelings don't matter. It's all survival mode. Literal survival mode. Please save my baby, and do it fast.
After I got to spend a few minutes with my new tiny baby (while he was getting his very first IV put in...aww! I got to experience a "first" already!), the first thing I had to do was sign a paper saying that if I didn't pump enough milk for him then they could use human milk bank milk. That was the very first matter of business. That is how important breast milk was to his tiny, underdeveloped, immature digestive system. I gladly signed it, even though I didn't know before that moment that there was such a thing as a human milk bank.
Then, a few hours later, a lactation consultant came to my room with a pump and asked if I wanted to pump and eventually try to breastfeed my baby. Uh...of course...you mean I can breastfeed him? But holy cow (no pun intended), I was not mentally prepared for that. You mean...just how does this work? Oh, so you're going to help me? Great...let's just throw privacy and propriety out the window then. But eventually I got to the point where half the medical professionals in Utah County had seen me try to breastfeed my baby and I hardly felt the need for a shirt when I was in the NICU. Ok, that's a slight exaggeration, but still. It was just a fact of NICU life.
Then, later that same day, there were two different people who came to my hospital room to request our participation in medical studies. Who knew, right? The very day I delivered a baby at 27 weeks. He didn't even have a name yet! One requested a whole vial of my saliva, and a swab of the inside of Caleb's cheek, to try to determine a genetic link behind prematurity. The other wanted to pull a card out of an envelope to determine if Caleb would go on a "high flow nasal canula" or a "continuous positive airway pressure (CPAP)" machine when he was ready to be taken off of the ventilator, to determine if one showed better results overall. He was chosen for the high flow nasal canula, in case you were wondering, but he eventually ended up using both at separate times. I never heard of the results of either of those studies. Nor the study that they did a month or so later, trialing a machine that monitors oxygen flow to the brain. But of course I wasn't going to turn down the chance to participate in these studies. Anything to help out babies to come.
And those were the unique experiences surrounding the delivery of a premature baby. Those are all things that seemed so small, but absolutely did not happen when I delivered a healthy baby.
If you're interested in seeing the whole story behind Caleb's crazy entrance into the world, here it is.
It's always so weird to me that in our photo files, this picture:
Is followed by this picture:
We were soooo unprepared for a baby!
My first time touching him...on the only extremity that wasn't occupied by a monitor, tube, or wire:
What a sweet, beautiful little surprise!
Friday, May 17, 2013
Remember When...
Remember when God gave us Russell?
I think it's easy to see that Caleb was a miracle baby.
But sometimes 8lb 5oz babies are miracles, too.
Nate and I always thought that two years was a great gap between our children. I don't know why. Maybe because that's how everyone else seemed to do it. So shortly after Caleb's first birthday we started praying and thinking about how to go about having another baby. Looking back, it seemed so early. Caleb was 13 months, but as far as milestones he was only 10 months. And his health and eating was so poor. We really had a lot to worry about with him at that point. But I started "doctor shopping" anyway. I saw two doctors (neither of which I actually ended up liking). One gave me a prescription for the same high dose of fertility drugs that was required to get pregnant with Caleb (200mg of Clomid). The other said that our bodies change after having a baby, so it would be wise to start with a lower dose (50mg) and work my way up 50mg at a time until I got pregnant. That's how I did it for my first pregnancy, and it took five rounds of Clomid over the course of nine months. That's a lot of time.
Nate and I prayed about it. It was scary to think about our chances of having multiples if I took the higher dose, especially since we had no way to know if I would deliver early again or not. If I could only carry one baby to 27 weeks, how far could I get with two? It was a scary thought. Our prayers were answered and we felt confident that I should take the higher dose of fertility drugs.
I didn't get pregnant on the first round. The medicine made me really sick. I remember telling Nate that I wasn't willing to take it a third time if I didn't get pregnant on the second round. I just couldn't handle deliberately making myself that sick. That we'd have to take a few months off, and take our time.
Then Caleb was put in the hospital for five days with RSV, a stomach virus, and an ear infection. He was so dehydrated that the IV fluids made him gain a whole pound in one day. He was 16 months old and only reached 17 pounds because of the fluids. He looked like a different baby. And we had to postpone the scope that would ultimately diagnose him with an eosinophilic disorder because he had a respiratory virus and couldn't go under anesthesia.
Then I got pregnant, after only two rounds of Clomid. We were very happy. It was all part of our plans. Just what we wanted. Our second baby would be born just one month after Caleb turned two. Perfect.
Then, not more than a month later, Caleb was diagnosed with eosinophilic enteritis. I was about eight weeks along, and scared to death. It's hereditary. Caleb would need a feeding tube. He would have needed one even if he hadn't received this diagnosis. What if I went on bed rest? What if I had another dangerously early preemie? All of the what ifs just seemed like too much to handle.
I kept thinking that if I hadn't gotten pregnant when I did, I would have put it off without hesitation. Truthfully, I resented my pregnancy for a while. It was such bad timing. We should have waited until Caleb's medical conditions had stabilized and we had all adjusted, which I sometimes feel may never happen. We may have been a family of three indefinitely; always feeling as though something is missing, but not having the courage to act on it because of our previous and scary experiences with Caleb.
The one thing that gave me comfort during my pregnancy was the knowledge that Russell would be part of our family because God wanted him here. It certainly wasn't a risk that I was willing to take. If I hadn't taken the higher dose of Clomid, if I hadn't gotten pregnant on the second round, if Caleb's scope hadn't been pushed back...then I would have chosen to not have another baby. God chose to give us Russell--failure to thrive, blue eyes, bald head, silly little personality, unknowns and all. He was meant to be in our family, so God made it happen just when it needed to happen.
And I'm so glad it happened how it did.
I think it's easy to see that Caleb was a miracle baby.
But sometimes 8lb 5oz babies are miracles, too.
Nate and I always thought that two years was a great gap between our children. I don't know why. Maybe because that's how everyone else seemed to do it. So shortly after Caleb's first birthday we started praying and thinking about how to go about having another baby. Looking back, it seemed so early. Caleb was 13 months, but as far as milestones he was only 10 months. And his health and eating was so poor. We really had a lot to worry about with him at that point. But I started "doctor shopping" anyway. I saw two doctors (neither of which I actually ended up liking). One gave me a prescription for the same high dose of fertility drugs that was required to get pregnant with Caleb (200mg of Clomid). The other said that our bodies change after having a baby, so it would be wise to start with a lower dose (50mg) and work my way up 50mg at a time until I got pregnant. That's how I did it for my first pregnancy, and it took five rounds of Clomid over the course of nine months. That's a lot of time.
Nate and I prayed about it. It was scary to think about our chances of having multiples if I took the higher dose, especially since we had no way to know if I would deliver early again or not. If I could only carry one baby to 27 weeks, how far could I get with two? It was a scary thought. Our prayers were answered and we felt confident that I should take the higher dose of fertility drugs.
I didn't get pregnant on the first round. The medicine made me really sick. I remember telling Nate that I wasn't willing to take it a third time if I didn't get pregnant on the second round. I just couldn't handle deliberately making myself that sick. That we'd have to take a few months off, and take our time.
Then Caleb was put in the hospital for five days with RSV, a stomach virus, and an ear infection. He was so dehydrated that the IV fluids made him gain a whole pound in one day. He was 16 months old and only reached 17 pounds because of the fluids. He looked like a different baby. And we had to postpone the scope that would ultimately diagnose him with an eosinophilic disorder because he had a respiratory virus and couldn't go under anesthesia.
Then I got pregnant, after only two rounds of Clomid. We were very happy. It was all part of our plans. Just what we wanted. Our second baby would be born just one month after Caleb turned two. Perfect.
Then, not more than a month later, Caleb was diagnosed with eosinophilic enteritis. I was about eight weeks along, and scared to death. It's hereditary. Caleb would need a feeding tube. He would have needed one even if he hadn't received this diagnosis. What if I went on bed rest? What if I had another dangerously early preemie? All of the what ifs just seemed like too much to handle.
I kept thinking that if I hadn't gotten pregnant when I did, I would have put it off without hesitation. Truthfully, I resented my pregnancy for a while. It was such bad timing. We should have waited until Caleb's medical conditions had stabilized and we had all adjusted, which I sometimes feel may never happen. We may have been a family of three indefinitely; always feeling as though something is missing, but not having the courage to act on it because of our previous and scary experiences with Caleb.
The one thing that gave me comfort during my pregnancy was the knowledge that Russell would be part of our family because God wanted him here. It certainly wasn't a risk that I was willing to take. If I hadn't taken the higher dose of Clomid, if I hadn't gotten pregnant on the second round, if Caleb's scope hadn't been pushed back...then I would have chosen to not have another baby. God chose to give us Russell--failure to thrive, blue eyes, bald head, silly little personality, unknowns and all. He was meant to be in our family, so God made it happen just when it needed to happen.
And I'm so glad it happened how it did.
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Russell's Birth Story
I know, I know, my baby is already four weeks old and I'm just getting around to writing his birth story. Can you blame me? I have hardly slept in the last month. It's a little crazy around here.
The Story:
Wednesday, December 14th: At my regular OB appointment the doctor stripped my membranes and scheduled an induction for my due date, December 21st. I was 3cm dilated and about 90% effaced.
Saturday, December 17th: I finished the last of my Christmas shopping. While buying Russell a bank for his Christmas gift, the lady at the check-out asked when I was due. I told her that I had an induction scheduled for Wednesday, and that I was too comfortable being pregnant to think that I'd be going into labor on my own. That evening, around 6PM, I went from having no contractions whatsoever to having really painful ones every few minutes. They were too painful and too fast to even be able to time them. Jenna was planning on coming to our house that evening anyway, and she got there just in time. I was ready to go NOW.
So, Nate and I left for the hospital around 7PM. When we got there I was dilated to 5cm, my water was bulging, and I was having very strong, regular contractions lasting at least 60 seconds and coming every two minutes. They admitted me right away and offered an epidural. Remembering how awful the epidural made me feel last time (and how it hardly even took the edge off of the contractions, anyway), I wanted to wait as long as I could before getting it. But my contractions were soooo strong that every time I would get one I would say, "I think it's time for an epidural!" But every time the contraction would end, I would be sooo happy that I could feel my legs. So I decided to get an epidural once my water broke, because I had heard that contractions were much stronger after that.
The nurse didn't think it would take very long at all for Russell to come. She thought he would be here before midnight since it was my second delivery and my contractions were so strong and close together. Our goal was to make it past midnight, since I needed at least four hours of antibiotics since I was group B strep positive.
About an hour and a half after getting to the hospital, the nurse checked me again and I was 6-7cm. Right after checking me, my water broke and the first thing I said was, "I want an epidural!" It took almost another hour before the epidural was in, but I guess my contractions were so strong to begin with that it didn't get any worse after my water broke. And the epidural was much better than last time--it took the pain away, but I could still feel and move my legs!
Then Nate slept, and I tried to sleep. The nurse checked me every hour and surprisingly I wasn't 10cm until about 3am! At that point she noticed that Russell was posterior (facing up towards the ceiling, not down towards the floor). Posterior babies are much harder to push out, because they can't descend down the birth canal as easily. That's why it took me so long to dilate even with those crazy contractions. So, then I got another dose of epidural, threw up, and the doctor came in and I started pushing.
After about 15 minutes of pushing with the doctor trying to turn Russell so he wasn't posterior, the doctor told me that I was pushing effectively, but that this wouldn't be a typical second delivery. :( Russell was big and he wasn't able to turn him, so I shouldn't expect delivery to be fast or easy. Sad! So, then the doctor left and I pushed with the nurse for the next TWO HOURS! Yikes! Two hours of giving it my all in the middle of the night. It was HARD WORK!
At that point, I needed another dose of epidural. And I started getting this excruciating pain by my left hip bone that didn't go away with the epidural. It felt similar to an ovarian cyst rupturing (which I've had many times), only much more painful. I couldn't think of anything but the pain. I had to press my fingers into my side to make the pain even somewhat manageable. I kept saying, "I can't...I don't..." thinking, "I can't do this any more! I don't know how much more I can take!" But I knew that I didn't have any other options.
Then I threw up again. The doctor came in and said, "How do you feel about forceps?" And I said, "YES, PLEASE!" So, after about two pushes with the forceps and a few more pushes otherwise, Russell made his grand entrance!
Eleven hours of labor and two hours and fifteen minutes of pushing in the wee hours of the morning, and I delivered my 8lb 5oz, 19 inch boy!
I got to see him get cleaned off and weighed, and I got to hold him skin-to-skin right away for about an hour. He was born hungry and had enough energy to nurse for over half an hour right after birth. I swear he's been hungry every second of his life. VERY different from Caleb!
And I'm proud to say that between all of my sisters, I now hold the record for the smallest baby and the biggest baby. :)
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